That awkward moment when a sentence doesn't end the way you think it octopus.

how did the kid cut open his forehead? by putting on his underwear!

A man didn't feel well so he went to the toilet. He had explosive diahrria, then felt better.

The Dalai Lama orders a slice of pizza for $2 and gives the cashier a $5 bill. He then realizes he hasn't been given any change, so he asks for his change. The cashier quickly apologizes and hands the Dalai Lama three dollar bills.

A lepord can carry two times its weight into a tree, i dont have a joke for this yet but youll leave here learning something.

What did peter griffin say to the black guy? Oh you are black.

Why cant the guy drink his beer Because he hasnt opened it yet

What did Michelle Obama get for Christmas? Cancer

Knock knock. Who's there? The Gestapo.

What did the rabbi say to the Muslim? I don't know I wasnt there. But it probably had something to do with their varying religions.

What did the little boy say to Micheal Jackson? Shouldn't you be dead?

So I picked my nose while peeing, and it fell in the toilet so I didn't have to wipe it on anything. This is more of a story I wanted to share than a joke

How do you know if you're gay? You find yourself sleeping with people of the same sex.

Well Here Goes Nothing And nothing happened

people say i have big feet but you know what the say about people with big feet? :) big socks. sl

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

What did the Macedonian guy say to the Croatian guy? Both of our countries are from the former Yugoslavia.

Why did sally fall of of the swing she had no arms

If you don`t see a banner here, it doesn`t mean it wont come back to annoy you whenever it feels like.... P.S, Advertising helps us get rich while permanently harming your ability to focus, Please be understanding! PS: Why the hell do they use capital letters after you know, Commas? its, Weird!

what did the man say to the person he hates? nothing!

I flipped through the Yellow Pages, made a few calls, and found the Chinese man I was looking for.

"Why is Barney green and purple?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way."

Hellen Keller went to town a ridin on a pony, stuck a feather in her hat and called it.. ashhlerthurbujahustar.

swag

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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