How do black people vote? They go to their polling place, register, then vote for their candidate on election day.

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What's the hardest part about being a pedophile? Fitting in.

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How do you make a tissue dance? Tissues are inanimate objects, they cannot dance and thinking otherwise is foolish.

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Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

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If there are anti jokes why are there no uncle jokes?

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Q: why does the man like men? A: because he is gay

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what did one worm say to the other worm? nothing. worms are incapable of speaking.

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"Why did Jim Jones put cyanide in the People's Temple Flavor Aid?" Because he understood that adding sugar would be bad for their teeth.

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Q: What did the serial rapist say to his best friend? A: You're a good friend

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what happened to the boy who got hit by a truck he went to the hospitel

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You know whats funny about 9/11? Nothing.

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How do you make a clown cry? You hit them with an axe

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What did the homeless black guy write on his sign? need money for weed.

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a disabled man takes a walk in a park

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why did the chicken cross the road? because he was very hungrey and saw some seed on the other side.

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How are friends and bananas alike? If you peel their skin and eat them they die.

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why couldnt the baby walk through the door? because it had a javeline through its head.

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Why should we dislike all the jokes on the Newest Page? Well you should too. >.>

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What do boats and starving children have in common? They both float, except for the starving children.

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Duke Nukem censored line: What are you waiting for? the celebration of the day you crucified Jesus and ate his flesh and blamed it upon the anti christ because of... Victory? Because you know Jesus gave his life in order to prove that he was immortal and died for your sins because his life is eternal... Satan your Moral Man: Nah, lets just go with "what are you waiting for, christmas?" Now go celebrate you murdering your savior which said "ill be back" on the cross and returned three days later at his second coming? Seriously? I thought only Jesus: The guy that was totally an ARAB (deny it and be consumed in the flames of hell, not my problem), and Jesus: strikes back came out, where can I get Jesus: The third coming? Factoid: Yeah Jesus was totally a blonde haired white man which went clothed in the finest ARYAN silks, in addition he only drove in his MUSTANG 9001 and smoked Lucky Strike... Which did nothing for his luck...

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A teenage boy is getting ready to take his girlfriend to the prom. First he goes to rent a tux, but there's a long tux line at the shop and it takes forever. Next, he has to get some flowers, so he heads over to the florist and there's a huge flower line there. He waits forever but eventually gets the flowers. Then he heads out to rent a limo. Unfortunately, there's a large limo line at the rental office, but he's patient and gets the job done. Finally, the day of the prom comes. The two are dancing happily and his girlfriend is having a great time. When the song is over, she asks him to get her some punch, so he heads over to the punch table and there's no punchline.

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Why Did the throw up He was sick

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What's the difference between a pair of slippers and a pair of dead babies? Essentially nothing.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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