Yo mamma so poor she got a job.

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why did the chicken cross the road? the sudden lack of sidewalk dictated as such.

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Why did the pot-head have red eyes? He got soap in them.

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How many ants are in the kitchen? None. We killed them all.

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whats worse than a worm in your apple..? getting shot..

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What do a Mexican and a elephant have in common? Aside from the fact they're both alive beings, they share the same kingdom, phylum, class and the fact of both being alive beings, each other are in constant contact with the environment, they both share affectionate ties with partners of their species, being them from the same family, breeding partner ou even just alive beings of the same especies of each one.

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you go to cvs and theres a robber trying to shoot everyone and the cashier says do you have a rewards card

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The world does not deserve our rule, it requires effort, teamwork, respect for oneself and others, tolerance, love, patience, strength, honor, loyalty... ...Face it, people do this because it is far easier to be ruled, than to rule, it is far easier to do as told, than to ask oneself what one desires with ones life. A king that suffers the burden of his people, falls of his throne, a king that enjoys the burdens of his people, creates burden, and grows as people suffer. We cannot change that, maybe we have yet to evolve to that point as humans, or maybe it is time to accept, that we have evolved past this.

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I really want to know something would all of you like to go on Suspension for 3 weeks? Mr Goodwin

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? It is unlikely that this situation would occur, as tractors are very large objects and losing one would be very hard, furthermore, tractors are vital agricultural vehicles and most farmers would take care in not misplacing one.

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what's worse than stubbing your toe? a hospital fire.

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Why can't the black guy read? Because he's blind.

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What happens when a monkey eats banana. It throws them up and gets some blueberry pie.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing?? ShE had no arms. Knock knock... Whose there? Not Susie

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Two homosexuals are making love in the kitchen. One leaves for a bit and says, "Dont finish without me." Upon returning, white goo is spattered across the floor. Concerned that the clumsily dropped icing may stain, they promptly clean it.

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Q- Why? A- Why not?

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Why did the chicken crose the rode? Because there was a 10 foot scorpion chaseing it

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why the chicken cross the road? because he just committed 3rd degree murder and was try'in to commit suicide

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Why don't black people listen to country music Because every time they here hoe down the think there wife just got shot No sorry for anybody who's black I luv ya don't think twice I have thirty blk friends

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Q: What does Harry Potter say when he answers the phone? A: "No, she's dead. This is her son."

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Bob: This joke is so hilarious but you must start off by saying knock knock. Tom: okay... Knock knock Bob: who's there? Tom: ...... Bob: well? Tom: I don't know what to say??? Bob: so the joke left ya speechless!

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A man and a Rabbit are in a bar , the Rabbit looks at the man and says, none of this is real.

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I'm Andrew Schmitt

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It is wrong to strip a homeless man of his clothes and chew his face off. Note to self: Explain this to someone before they have taken bath salts.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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