What do you call a man will dementia who just killed his cousins, wife, children, and teacher. His name. He's still a man until he's put in a mental institution.

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Q: What did the donkey say to the man? A: "Hello there, sir." it was later discovered the man was tripping on the hallucinogen LSD. Later on the man plummeted to his death after being convinced that he was a pterodactyl, and jumping off of a cliff.

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Q: How man Jews can you fit in a box? A:if your German than you tell me.

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Is it better to be born black or gay? No way to know. That is, unless you are black and gay.

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Wife: Where were you all night. Husband: Cheating on you with your sister

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Q. what is your favorite food? A. Chicken, burritos, sandwich, rice, hot dog, turkey, duck, carrot, broccoli, eggplant, apple, blueberry, pear, raspberry, blackberry, orange, grapes fries, chips, cheese, pretzels, worms, and candy canes.

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Two trains, each having a speed of 30km/h, are headed at each other on the same straight track. A bird that can fly 60km/h flies off the front of one train when they are 60km apart and heads directly for the other train. After reaching the other train, the bird flies directly back to the first train, and so forth. What is the total distance the bird travels before the train collide? Who cares about the bird if two trains are going to collide? You need to call this in immediately.

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What is brown, white, and red all over? A part asian part white guy covered in blood after having her girlfriend have her period while they were having sex in a club in alaska near a military school that was abandoned and is now haunted but justin bieber took care of that.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down, broke his crown, sued the water company, bought a huge settlement and ran off with that slut Little Bo Peep.

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I admit I don't know what the future holds, but one thing I know for sure is that... Lance Armstrong has only one ball.

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Q: What is every blonde's ambition? A: To be like Vanna White and learn the alphabet.

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a guy walks into another tall man knowing that he has something weird in his mouth. he pulls out a fly, apologizes for running into him and promptly walks to his small appartment to brush his teeth. the next day a fridge hits him in the face and he spontaneously combusts. he was never seen again.

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A man walks into a doctors office and waits for his turn. After his name was called he walked up to the doctor and told him that he kept having hallucinations. The doctor prescribed an antibiotic to help with the mans addiction to LSD.

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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a little boy goes down stairs on xmas day he has three presents the first one was a pair of socks the second one was a football and the third one was shin pads the boy was now crying really loud santa is outside laughing why? the boy has no legs

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Jerry: Hi what's your name? Bob: My name is bob. Jerry: Bob, nice to meet you, my name is Jerry. Bob: Nice to meet you Jerry.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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Q:your jetski loses a wheel. how many pancakes does it take to fix your house? A:blue berry icecream.

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What did the man say to the cat? I thought you were fake.

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A black man has a woman up against a wall, and she is screaming. they are passionate lovers and he is pleasing her greatly.

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Knock Knock, Who's there? Me, get naked bitch!

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What's the difference between a sewer pipe and a French fry? A lot

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Everybody has a penis! EVERY BODY! WHY can't feminists admit this obvious anatomical fact? Gahhhh!

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Chuck Norris' beard takes 1st 2nd and 3rd in the most impressive beard catagory. He was the only contestant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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