Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, that was a turkey. Oh.

how do you put a elephant in a fridge? open it and put it inside. how do you put a lion in a frige? you take out the elephant and put in the lion. there is a meeting for all the animals in the world which animal doesnt go? the lion because he's in the fridge. a man callshis dog and it doesnt come why not? because its at the meeting

YO MAMA SO SHORT she should really consider wearing long tunic-like blouses, prints that contain vertical stripes, and heeled shoes with a pointed toe in order to create the illusion of length to her silhouette. That having been said, society's limited definition of beauty is quite inadequate for the diverse world in which we live.

Two hunters are in the woods. One of them clutches his chest, falls to the ground, and loses consciousness. In a panic, the other hunter calls 911 and tells the operator that his friend might be dead of a heart attack. The operator says "Before we send a coroner instead of an ambulance, first make sure he's dead." The hunter says "Alright." There is a pause and then BLAM! "Okay," says the hunter, "now what?" The operator follows standard procedures to keep the hunter on the phone, lucid and calm. 45 minutes later, police reach the scene, arrest the hunter and begin a months-long investigation. Forensics determines that the dead hunter was likely alive prior to being shot in the face at point-blank range. The defendant is charged with first-degree murder and receives a 30-year sentence. On the 9th year of his sentence, he is stabbed in the chest 6 times by an initiate in a rival prison gang and dies the next day. He was 53.

A horse enters a bar. The bartender looks at the horse and says "Why the harness?"

What do u call old black people in a shed? antique farm equiptment

Q: Why do Mexicans love rice and beans? A: Because it's fairly easy to grow in places with relatively low rainful and high temperatures like that in which they live in.

Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Okay

roses are red , violets are blue i love bernard he loves me too if you take him from my place i'll smash my fist in your face.

knock knock? who's there Dave Come on in!!!!!

Why did the toilet paper roll? Because it isn't rock!

What does a Twihard, a Brony, a Belieber and a Gleek all have in common? They all ruin the Internet.

why did the mans alarm clock go off at six am? he has a high paid job he doesnt want to let down.

Knock knock. Who's there? Big Brother. Big Brother who? That's right. ALL are who, Akbar!

A man is unemployed, ugly, short, fat, smelly and stupid. That's what she said.

Why did the astronaut die in space? Just kidding there was no astronaut. It was a cucumber

What did Tom see after taking a much need long nap? The ceiling.

Knock knock! Who's there? ... There was no reply because the person who knocked was the mailman delivering a package, and he had a tight schedule so he couldn't stay around to chat.

A person tells an anti-joke. Nothing out of the ordinary happens.

what did the lesbian say to the man? I don't like penis

What's green and has wheels? grass... i lied about the wheels

Why did timmy fall off his bike? Someone threw a fridge at hm

Q. What did the boy do for his birthday? A. Nothing. His birthday occurred on 9-11.

what's worse than failing a test? having your house burnt down

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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