Why did the man answer his cell phone at 3 AM in the morning? Because his phone was ringing and was probably waiting for an important phone call

Why couldn't the Asian man drive very well? He was blind from birth.

What do you call a house big enough to fit all the poor people in America? A fairly large establishment without quality standards.

What's the quickest way to a man's heart? A knife.

Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

Good friends are like snowflakes. They disappear when you pee on them.

A black man accidentally walks into a white man......they apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

Why did the jew save his money? Because his wife has cancer and the radiation treatments are very expensive.

A blonde dies Lololol

What kind of cheese isn't yours? Someone else's.

Why wouldn't anyone want Helen Kellers dog? It's been buried for a long time...

how do you prevent a chicken from contracting aids?? you make him a little chicken condom.

What do a goat and an eagle have in common? They both can fly, except for the goat.

What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre.

Whats worse than a dead baby? Two dead babys.

Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants? It was probably a cold day.

Why do Jews have such large noses? Hereditary genetics.

My great grandfather died in a concentration camp. The poor guy fell off the guard tower.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Bend Over.

How did the man die? He was killed alive.

Jake: Where's Waldo Me: Where? Jake: I don't know

Why are you gay? Because ***** you

John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. John runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

Darth Vader: Luke, I am your father! Luke: You're not my dad!!! HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAAHA PENIS

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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