What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? ouch.

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What did the Rabbi get for Christmas? Nothing because as you know Rabbi's are members of the Jewish community and therefore don't celebrate Christmas.

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A man walks into a bar and the bartender suddenly runs out the door frantically yelling, "He's got a gun! He's got a gun!" Meanwhile, inside the bar, the patrons overpowered the gunman, tied him up and took his weapon and all the cash he had. They later used his money to buy more drinks at another bar.

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What did the man say to the cat? Nothing. He doesn't have a cat.

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Anti-Joke is a sticky wicket.

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What do you call a fat zombie? Dead

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What's worse than a dog peeing on your new flower garden? A terrorist attack.

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What's the difference between a red shirt and a blue shirt? one is red and one is blue

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There was three women stuck on an island, a blonde, a brunette and a ranga. They are saved days later.

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denisssssssssssssss

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Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

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a murderer sees a young child left alone at a park... he promptly finds the childs mother and returns her to her home.

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What's another name for asexual reproduction? Parthenogenesis.

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What about the cool kids down the block. Their friend just died with a serious health condition.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Tell her to jump over your car, then drive by in a truck

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A vulture gets on a transatlantic flight with a dead animal in each claw. The flight attendant stops him, and says "I'm sorry, sir, only one piece of carrion per passenger allowed"

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What do you do if you run over a black man? Call an ambulance... he's probably about to die.

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what the difference between a dog and a blue whale? im going to burn your house down

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cøck in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

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I was raped the other day... I still did more work than the bitch

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Ask me if im a truck are you a truck no

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What did Rachel (the columbine girl) get for her birthday?? Nothing she's dead.

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What did bob say when he was told his beloved parents were dying? "oh"

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In retrospect, I was wrong to microwave all those cats.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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