Where do cows go on the weekends? The slaughterhouse.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

How do you get down from a horse?? You don't... You get down from a duck.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Hey I just banged you, and it was crazy, delete my number, and keep the baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

what do you get when you cross an ant with toni? ANTONI

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why do so many black people like watermelon? The same reason so many white people, do. Have you had that stuff, it's really good!

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Why was the girl crying? She had just been severely raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +31

A man walks into a coffee shop and buys a bookshelf.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

c======3

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Sticks and stones may break my bones because I have osteoporosis

thumb_up thumb_down +29

John: hey wats up? Bob: gas prices!

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How many amish does it take to change a lightbulb? Presumably only one, but since they do not generally use electricity it has yet to be tested.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How do you double any amount of cash? Stack it up and fold it in half.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Q; What's the new slogan for the TSA? We handle more junk than EBay.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What do you call a concentration camp with a mental disability? Auschwistic.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

There is a blond and a burnette in a car. The blonde is driving. What a nice use of the carpool

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +29

PLEASE HELP IM TRAPPED IN SOME GUYS HOUSE PLEASE SOMEBODY HAS TO SEE THIS IF I TEXT HE WILL SEE IT IM AT

thumb_up thumb_down +29

why did the kid struggle in school? because hes mentally retarted

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Q: How many teenagers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they just sit in the dark and complain about it.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

what did the african say after he got beat by the cops? wow i really shouldn't have sliced that mans head off.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What kind of ship never sinks? Not the Titanic.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops