A snail buys a car from a dealership, and then asks the manager if he could paint a large S on the side of the car. The manager agrees, and the snail drives away. From the parking lot, the manager sees the car go straight on to the highway and get hit by a truck. Unfortunately, snails cannot drive.

Q: What's worse than burning your tongue on hot chocolate. A: Getting shanked by a homeless man

A man is on a military operation, he dies and has a funeral.

How does a black man get down the stairs? He walks.

How do you take a shit?, by taking it to go.

WELCOME TO THE GARLIC BOYS SHOW! So kids, what are we gonna eat today? POTATOES! FUUUUUUU! Moral: You say tomata, I say WROOOOOOOONG, you say cheap I say your mother.

"This is what kind of fail class?" "AN EPIC FAIL!"

A black guy, a white guy, and a Canadian walk into a bar what do they all have in common. They are all involved in my Joke.

What do blind people see when they close one eye? Nothing.

A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

Me and a pig had sex, beastieality.

Why couldn't the pirate watch the violent movie? Because pirates died along time ago

What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer.

Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

What's white and black and red all over A nun with a spear throug her head

What did the deaf-blind kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

What did Michael Jackson say to the little boys before they came to his house? Get on the ferris wheel

What do you call a Mexican policeman? Officer.

rose's are red violets are blue I have touretts blblblblblblblblbbl

whose a bitch? ian doyle's a bitch

Roses are read violets are blue i ate a fetus now you die to

Why did the man fall off his bike? He ran into a pile of dead babies.

"bluar blah blah blarRR/ the stupid pointless part" dead people/ animals/ objects can't talk/ drive/ operate compueter, lol I'm so focken funni

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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