Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Okay

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Roses are red, Violets are red, I stabbed someone in my garden, There's blood everywhere

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Where did Sally go when the bomb hit her? Everywhere

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Why do deer have horns? Because god made them that way.

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What happened when the boy got caught with his hand in the cookie jar? He gets shot in the face by Santa.

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Why can't black people get sunburned? Natural selection allowed ancient Africans to develop a darker skin shade that would counter strong UV rays.

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A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

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why did the kid sit alone at lunch? he had no friends

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why was justin sad? his family was murdered

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What's worse than being short? Being a Tutsi in 1994.

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whats worse then a child with a dead mom? the baby is still inside.

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Why was the Magic: The Gathering player a virgin? Because he was underage and it would have been immoral for him to have had sex.

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Is your refrigerator running? I heard there was a power outage in your area.

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What do you call a baby with no arms or legs? You call a lawyer, and be sure to have him ask the mother if she took Thalidomide during pregnancy.

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You know who can't stand to put up with my shit? Polio victims.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft.

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Friends are like trampolines, I always wanted a trampoline

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

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Man: Hey girl for a minute there I thought I had died and gone to heaven, but now I realize that I am very much alive, and that heaven has been brought to me. Girl: No actually you were right the first time we are both dead right now.

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what's mouthwatering and smells like fish? salmon

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Chuck Norris once jumped off of a 9 story building. He broke half of the bones in his body because he is 71 years old.

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Q: Did you hear about the blonde who shot an arrow into the air? A: She missed.

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Like is like a penis long and easy. But women make it hard

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What did the ghost say to the black man? nothing. He just shot him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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