Q:Why don't black people go on cruises? A:They already fell for that trick once.

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What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

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What's twelve inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

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Yo mama so old when I slapped her on the back her tits fell off.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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PROS = good things CONS = bad thing So, if PROgress is a good thing...then why is the US government call CONgress?

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Why did Humpty Dumpty fall off the wall? The wall was unstable and not to be sat on.

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What did batman say to robin before they entered the batmobile? Get in.

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Two gay guys are cuddling in a park when they spot a hot, busty blonde jogging near them. One turns to the other and says, "Damn... It's days like this I wish I was a lesbian."

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A dog walked into a bar. He was a trained seeing-eye dog leading a man who had been blind since a tragic industrial accident a year before.

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What's funny about anti-jokes? Nothing.

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What are the biggest ants in the world? Ants under a magnifying glass.

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A bar walks into a man... Wait, that's impossible.

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What is grosser than somebody eating their own booger? Someone else eating that persons booger

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What does Chuck Norris order at McDonalds? A Big Mac with a large fry and drink.

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What is similar between the Holocaust and soccer? They both suck.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

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What is the best time to go to the dentist? When you have a toothache

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What's Red, Smells like Blue Paint, What tastes like the sea, and has been doused in the essence of the 80's? If you can come up with something, don't bother; This is a trick question. The space was to give you time to think. Forget your answer.

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(Mortal Kombat Annihilation) Princess Kitana: "Mother, you're alive" Sindel: "Too bad you, will die" (Troll 2) "They're eating her. And then they're gonna me. Oh my gawwwwwwwwd." (The Room) Johnny: I did not hit her, it's not true! It's bullshitt! I did not hit her! [throws water bottle] Johnny: I did *not*. Oh hi, Mark. Mark: Oh, hey Johnny, what's up?

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What happened to the pleasure robot he pleasured someone in the pussy

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what did the guy say when he lost his sandwich? wheres my sandwich?

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Why is 13 the most hated number? 13 is Jewish.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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