What's worse than 10 babies in one bin? 1 baby in 10 bins.

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What do you call 12 ghosts? A bus accident.

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Depending on whether you have permission to eat it, either stolen property, or a nice snack shared between friends.

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What did the fish say when it swam into the concrete wall? Nothing. Fish cannot speak

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So, a black guy walked into a bar. "Ouch," he said.

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What did the hobo say while giving birth? bob come over here and hold my third leg for me??

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An american, a mexican, and an asian are on a boat. The boat is sinking because it is too heavy. The people decide to throw off things that they have a lot of in their country. The asian throws rice off the boat saying, "We have plenty of rice at home." The mexican throws tacos off the boat saying, "We have plenty of tacos at home." The american throws out the mexican saying, "We have plenty of mexicans at home."

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He wanted to catch the frisbee that was thrown to him.

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how do you get mhairi mcdonald to shut up? rip out her throat.

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whats blue and fluffy ? Blue fluff

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What's worse than 20 babies stapled to one tree? One baby stapled to 20 trees.

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Whats the difference between a mexican and a bench? A mexican is a human being while a bench is an inanimate object.

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An Antihumorous Story Part One A rich man named Richard told his son James that he could have anything in the world for his thirteenth birthday. James only asked for one thing: a silver box containing 542pink ping pong balls. So Richard gave him a metal box containing 542 pink ping pong balls. Five years later, Richard heard a strange noise coming from James' room. It was the sound of a machine whirring, then a high pitched scream. All of a sudden, James bursted out of his room and ran out of the house. Later, the boy could not recall the incident. It was completely erased from his memory. For his eighteenth birthday, James asked for a golden box containing 785 pink ping balls. So it was granted him. For the next ten years, Richard kept a careful eye on his son. Every night, James could be heard whispering madly, "It's almost ready," over and over. For his twenty-eighth birthday, James asked for a simple wooden box that had one million pink ping pong balls inside. "What do you need all those pink ping pong balls for?" Richard finally asked. James froze, fiddling with something in the pocket of his jacket. "Oh yes, that. They were necessary for--" Then he got hit by a bus.

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Why are young girls better at school than young boys? Because young boys think about young girls.

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Whats worse than a worm in your apple? A worm in your asshole.

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Global Warming.

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To girl in a bar: Grab your coat love... It's cold in my basement.

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how do you torched helen Keller? put her Ina round room and tell her the bathroom is around the corner

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Whats the difference between a waffle and a pancake? One is made in a waffle iron. And the other is made on a pan.

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What's worse than finding jokes that repeat on Anti-Joke.com? AIDS

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What do you call a man with a black head, a red body, white arms and yellow legs? To get to the other side.

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boy1: whats blue and goes blub blub? boy2:i dont know boy1:a blue blub blub boy1: whats green and goes blub blub? boy2:a green blub blub boy1:no. there is no such thing called a green blub blub

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P0P T4Rt

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A goat goes to the store and asks the store clerk where the potatoes are. The clerk told the goat to check aisle 5 for the potatoes. The goat goes to aisle 5 and there were no potatoes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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