A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: "What kind of bread would you like? Brown or white?". Penguins answers: "Well, it doesn't really matter since I came here by car!".

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Two black guys walk into a bar. One of them was white.

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person 1. Did you here about the black guy who went to college? person 2.no person 1. either have i whats ironic is that they are both black

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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How many jews does it take to change a baby's diper? I don't know my wife will do it.

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once upon a time a guy thought he wrote an original anti joke but it wasnt

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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What do you call a black man driving an airplane? A pilot.

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the moment right after you finish the last harry potter and remember the world wasn't saved and you still have cancer

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What do you call a dead man walking? Someone on death row.

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What has four legs and is always ready to travel? Siamese twin fugitives.

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knock knock? who's there? ivan ivan who? ivan. i want you to apologize for tooking their jobs the other day i said ivan who? i dont have a middle or last name

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A black man, a chinese man, and a dog decide to have a race. Unfortunately, they are shot by a sniper on a roof while still in the planning stages.

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your mama's so fat she wears big clothing

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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What did the black guy say to the white guy? The black guy said, "hello". They then proceeded to have a normal conversation.

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why did bob marley die because he did also he smoked weed he was naughty!

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why did the black child cry? strange men cut his penis off

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How do you knock a cat out of a tree? If that doesn't work, use a lethal BB gun

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme This one doesn't.

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What should you do when your husband is staggering in the back yard Shoot him again

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Whats gayer then dancing with the stars? Justin beiber

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-Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? -No. -Well niether has he.

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Hey Patrick what am i ? Ebola No im Texas! What's the difference?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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