Why couldn`t Sally open the jar? Because she did not have thumbs.

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Why did the turtle take so long on his run? Because he never went on a run he walked.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? A: WHERE'S MY TRACTOR?!

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Knock Knock Who's There? The I.R.S.

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What does a blonde's pussy taste like? The same as her brain, cabbage.

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What is better than winning a gold medal at the parolympic games? Having two legs!

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What did the mexican firefighter name his kids? Jose and Pablo

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What part of a vegetable are you not supposed to eat? His wheelchair.

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What do u do when u hear about a smart Blonde. Cant think of anything? Exactly

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Why is the boy lying down on the floor? The chandelier fell on him.

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What shall we do with the drunken sailor? Call the police to have him escorted off the boat for operating a large veichle under the influence of alcohol.

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How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

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whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

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what do you call a cat that looks like a lion 7

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How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

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Q: Why did Steve fall out of the tree A: He was raking the leaves

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?! No one... pineapples float.

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Roses are red violets are red bushes are red oh shit my garden is on fire

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why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

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Why did th chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. Why did the cupboard cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Many people dont know this about me, but I'm not very famous.

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Why was Sally angry? Because somebody burned all her clothes

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A man found out that he had hit the lottery and would be receiving 300 million dollars, but he had to fly to china to do so. The man took a plane to China from New York and would arrive within the next several hours. Meanwhile, in australia a god-cow was producing infinitely large amounts of concentrated milk. His milk was so infinitely large in mass that it collapsed on its own mass and turned into black hole; absorbing the entire Earth. The man never got to receive his money from winning the lottery

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops