A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender said "why the long face?" The horse then panicked, and feeling threatened, it kicked the bartender with its hind legs and galloped out of the bar. A civilian took immediate control of the situation and dialed the number for animal control, who arrived shortly and tranquilized the deer and put it back in its natural habitat. Don't worry, that didn't actually happen

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What do pancakes and Smokie Bear have in common? They both don't have aids

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T-rex: If you're happy and you know it clap your hands, oh...

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What is funnier than 24 69

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why are anti-jokes so funny? they aren't. they're stupid.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like funny jokes but I tend to ruin the punchline by just talking too much and that's probably why no one likes me and...

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you are as stupid as alec. lol neewb

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cock in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

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Why couldn't the girl eat her pizza? She had no face.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has two legs

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How did the black kid get in school? By taking the bus.

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What did Batman say to Robin to get in the car? Get in the car.

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What do you call a black man that can steal, shoot, and jump? A basketball player.

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why didn't bob die? because he liked his hair just the way it was.

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Why couldn't the boy with no arms and no Legs swim? Because he was black.

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How do you get a baby to be quiet? Put it in the oven for a few minutes

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Nothing, because they weren't made. Cupcakes were made instead. Sorry, Muffins.

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How do you make lady gaga cry? Give her bad romance haven't you heard this joke before......DUMBASS

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What's difficult and tedious to do? Trying to find a joke with 0 thumbs up/down -Sykes

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Whats 89 x 67? Sponge. Whats 10 + 9? 19 Whats 9 + 10? 21!

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What do you call a woman in the kitchen? Her name.

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What do a fish and a helicopter have in common? Neither of them is a police officer.

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What did Sherlock Holmes say when he saw a very pretty lady? Hello

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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