Q: What did the dragon say to the other dragon A: Nothing they did'nt exicest.

What do you do when life gives you lemons? Kindly reject the offer and give it back to life.

I know a black person. His name is Mikey.

What's the difference between Harry Potter and a Jew? Harry made it out the chamber.

Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

Knock Knock Who's there Kevin Kevin who Kevin your friend dumbass

White guy: I figure she's a gold digger, my neighbor. Black guy: Did you say the N word?

my girlfriend had a weird fetish, she used to dress up like herself and act like a bitch all the time.

Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

A black man is like a sledge hammer; if you compare him to a sledge hammer, he will hit you with a sledge hammer.

Why did Austin Bell smell like tuna? He had sea food at Joes Crab Shack

A brachiosaurus walks into a cafe "Excuse me I'm an herbivore, can I have a full English breakfast, but with veggie sausages instead of normal sausages, and mushrooms instead of bacon?" Shop keeper: "No you can't. Your too big. You've destroyed my kitchen, and my livelihood. I have nothing left. You've accidently reduced my business to rubble by walking through the door"

Man: Why do you wear your wedding ring on the wrong finger? Woman: Oh, wow, thanks for pointing that out. Silly me.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's a blind-deaf-mute.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

It got hit by a rocket.

What would you say if you girlfriend got hit by a train? Trick question, trains don't go through kitchens!

Why didn't the cab driver pick up the black man? Because the cab driver already had a passenger and it would be unprofessional to pick up another person.

What did the blonde say to the other blonde? "Hey, do you want to get something to eat?"

What did the doctor say to the actor? Your an actor.

Three men stumble upon an ancient lamp in the desert. They sell it to a museum and split the profits evenly.

four blondes where on their way to disneyworld they see a sign that say disneyworld:left so they turn around wondering where disneyworld went

Why was the boy embarrassed when he opened his parents' bedroom door? Because he had been trying the door for several minutes until he realized he was pushing instead of pulling.

knock knock whos there. no one your hullicinating, heroine is hell of a drug

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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