Why doesn't Andy wanna bend over to puck something up? That's how he got assraped!

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

a teacher walked into a bar and when he walked out he went to his car and proceeded to take notes about the bible, not realising he's supposed to be writing notes from his English book... he's dyslexic and got punched in the eye while he was in the bar; did i mention he doesn't drink?

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What does? 42

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What's worse than having a gay friend? 9/11.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

whats brown and half eaten? yeah an easter egg that a parent has given to there son/daughter before dinner

thumb_up thumb_down -34

How did the little boy die? Malaria Why? He was poor. Why? A Jew stole his money.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did the lebanese man kill his own family? He had cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? cause it was dead...

thumb_up thumb_down -34

If I could Rearrange the alphabet, i would put U and Q together.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What did Billy say when he met the president? Nice to meat you Mr. President? -Louis

thumb_up thumb_down -34

What did the mexican firefighter name his 2 children? Jose and Juan.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

write I if you think we should all yell A when dylan says orange.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A man walks into a bar. He orders a drink.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Sir, do you know what time it is? Yes, it is 5:15 PM

thumb_up thumb_down -34

in·fun·dib·u·lum? 1. a funnel-shaped organ or part. 2. a funnel-shaped extension of the hypothalamus connecting the pituitary gland to the base of the brain. 3. a space in the right ventricle at the base of the pulmonary artery.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Three irishmen walk into a bar...every day, and then stay until it closes.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

I have your mom in bed just kidding, i killed her Then barried her

thumb_up thumb_down -34

All I can say is that its not the feds, and not Interpol nothing "legal" nor anything belonging to the state as far as we can tell. You all stay locked up, and I will make sure this little geek with shitty breath does not say anything about you, as for the rest, I cant say much.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Yesterday, my friend said I should facebook him. So I slammed a book into his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, build up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What do you call a dead man walking? Someone on death row.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

What do you call a black guy who flys a plane? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Doctor: You want the good news or bad news? Patient: Bad news. Doctor: You have terminal cancer. Patient: What's the good news? Doctor: You have AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down -36

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops