why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea?! No one... pineapples float.

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A man walks into a bar. He walks out again remembering he forgot his wallet.

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? Because she had no arms.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Look through your peephole, you lazy bastard.

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if you are reading this your wasting your time

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Why did the Chicken become a medium? To talk to the other side.

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i put a oie in the oven, it baked

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had two penises.

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What did the kid in the wheelchair get for Christmas? AIDS.

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What is worse than the holocaust. A worm in MY apple!

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A black man goes outside to shoot some hoops. He misses all of them because not all blacks are good at basketball.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Girl Scouts selling cookies! I'm not legally allowed within 500 yards of you. Please get off my property.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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Misner is a twat.

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Why did the old lady talk to a tree? She had Alzheimer's and was going to die.

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What did one fat chick say to the other fat chick? Who cares, they're fat.

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I was going to tell a joke about your mom's vagina, but that's overused.

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Q: What did the farmer say when his tractor broke down? A: oh noo my tractor broke down.

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Whats blue and smells like red paint? Blue paint.

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Knock Knock Who's there? After no response, the man chuckled as he realized the sound of his TV mimicked that of his door knocker.

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Why did the giraffe fall over? Because I shot it with a bowling ball cannon,

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops