what do you call a cow with no legs? ground BEEF!!!!

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Jennifer Kim... having a boyfriend!

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What has eyes but can not see, and rolls everywhere it goes? A man who fought for your freedom and lost both his eyesight and legs in doing so. Have some respect.

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Did you hear the one about the avalanche that crashed into the bar? It was such a tragedy.

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Amazing

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Why did the pilot crash the plane? Because he was a loaf of bread

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it can.

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Two guys walk into a bar, a spanish guy and a black guy. They get some drinks, call a taxi to arrive home safe. And kiss their wives and kids goodnight. They go to bed early after reading a wallstreet journal. And wake up early so they can both go to their jobs as college professors. To white kids.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? Cuz she had no arms! B I T C H

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Knock knock Who's there? Orange That's impossible...

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What's better than getting second place in the paralympics? Having legs.

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Thanks, I admire your sincerity, and I am happy to see that I got a lot more in common with you, than with well, my nerdy and geeky friends, which are not reading this here and now unless they are going against their orders and messing up their own work schedule. I just want you to know that I have fallen in love with you Nero, and if that is a problem for you, please let me know ASAP.

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What happened when Tim's house caught on fire? The fire department was contacted and they put the fire out.

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Stop. Seriously stop.

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Why did Sally fall off the Empore State Building? Her mother threw a refrigerator at her. -BG

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why did the woman get electricuted? because there was an electric fence around the kitchen.

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Two penguins walk are in the bathtub and says "can you pass me the soap?" the other one looks at him quite quarly and says "what do you think i am, a chainsaw?!?"

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what's black? a lot of things.

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What's red, white, and blue? light purple

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What is James Miller's real name? James Miller.

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Why didn't Sally go to the party? Because everybody hates her and she wasn't invited.

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What Do call a dog with an e A doge

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Yo momma's so old, she lives in a nursing home and is on various medications that she needs to take to stay in optimum health.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops