A man is talking to his friend. The man suddenly picks up a banana. He says "hello anybody there?" The banana says "yes." After a while of conversing, the man suddenly puts the banana down in a sad type of way. The man then says to his friend "I'm sorry, but your sun has just died in horrible accident.

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whats the best part about ebola? nothing ebola is a dangerous virus

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Knock Knock Whose there? Ben Dover Come in

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Whoever is reading this, I love you and I hope you have a great day.

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make me a sandwich! what kind?

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Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

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I started writing poetry the other day: POETR That's coming along nicely.

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper. No. A nun with a terrible nosebleed. Nobody ever reads the whole newspaper.

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What do you put your key on? A key chain.

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He was at Victoria's Secret and he wasn't watching where he was going.

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Justin's life

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Have you ever seen the movie called "The Tourist"? No

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Knock knock come in.

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What did the boy with no legs get for Christmas? A nice sweater.

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knock knock Dave's not here.

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How do you make a white girl commit suicide? Bully her.

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Where is boots, Dora asks Why the hell are you asking me when your the one who is with him.

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Q: Why did the dog bark? A: it cant talk.

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How do you make a boy cry? Pour soup on his head.

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Why is it a bad idea to stand in a thunder and lightning storm with a metal rod? Because you will get wet from the rain.

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What did Stephen Hawking say to a prostitute? Push me, and then just touch me, Till I can get my, Satisfaction.

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Why did Shrek eat the onions? Anyone who has seen the Shrek films would know that Shrek never mentions anything about eating onions. In the first movie, Shrek and donkey have a conversation in which he compares himself to an onion, but the scene lasts maybe a minute and never again does Shrek mention onions in any way, shape, or form. For whatever reason, this one scene has turned onions into the strongest signature icon associated with Shrek.

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im a policeman the car infront of me had a foot hanging out of the trunk. i pulled him over. i closed the trunk and proceeded to inform him of the dangers of open trunks.

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Whats the difference between a bottle of coke and a black man stuck in a phone booth? one of them is comparing himself to a bottle of coke, the other is a bottle of pepsi

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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