Quick! It's a fly, call the swat team!!!

Knock Knock. Who's There? Oh wait! i don't care!

Cosmopolitan magazine releases an issue without any sex tips.

Why did the baby die? Because I refused to feed it.

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way. ernkso

Roses are red. Violets are blue. The Clouds are white. Thank God I am too.

How do you find dennis ferguson? Look at danyons bckground

A ginger man ascends to heaven and reaches the pearly gates, seconds later he wakes up in a hospital bed and realizes it was merely a near death hallucination and God isn't real.

I had 99 problems Solved them all

A boy walks up to a girl he finds attractive and says "You're body's kick'in! ... i mean...hey, do you know karate?"

A man comes home to his wife sleeping with their neighbor. This lead to their divorce four months later.

A baby seal walks into a club.

What would you do if I ripped your face off? Bleed to death.

what is worse finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grub in your apple.

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

Knock knock Whos there A dead boy a dead boy who A dead boy who started tobuy drugs and didn't have the money for it and his family loved him and he was going to go to college

Yo Mama is like a gas station:pump and pay.

A man comes into a bar. Wait, it's a horse. A man comes into a horse.

Why did the blonde jump off the bridge? She was clinically depressed and wanted to end her life

Joey: hey bobby who you talking to? Bobby: oh yeah I forgot to tell you your mom died.

What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

Dont be racist be like mario he is an italian who looks like a mexican speaks english and picks up coins like a jew.

What do you get when you cross a RPG with a cell phone? A microwave

What's worse than the holicost? The ninja turtles

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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