You want to know something bad? A bag of dead babies. You wanna know something worse? One was still alive. You wanna know something even worse? He ate his way out. You wanna know something even worse? He went back for seconds.

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Why'd the clown fall out of the tree? it died. Why'd the cat fall out of the tree? it died Why'd the chicken fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the clown

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Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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So this guy is waiting for a heart transplant. He dies.

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What's black and white and red all over? Half a black face and half a white face after going through a blender

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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What do lazy asses get for Christmas? Fat

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Three construction workers, an Italian guy, a Mexican guy, and a American guy are sitting on top of a building eating lunch. The Italian is tired of eating meatballs, the Mexican is eating a burrito, and the American is eating a cheeseburger. They are all fed up with eating the same lunch every day. The next day they all jump off the building for unrelated reasons. It is a tragedy and their families mourn the loss.

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You know what's worse than finding a real joke on antijoke.com? AIDS

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was getting chased by nazis.

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How did Debbie get a black eye? Because her dad asked her to take off her pants and she refused so he beat her

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Where did the two Jews ride when they got married? In the back of the oven.

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A blonde drank an entire fruit smoothie in one sitting. She got a brain freeze.

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Whats red and goes round and round? A baby in the garbage disposal

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Roses are blue Violets are red I'm colour blind Which is sometimes quite annoying

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an alien is walking down the street he can't breathe our air and quickly suffocates and dies

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Q: Why was the chicken waterboarded? A: Because the guy liked being cruel to animals.

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So three men walk into a bar and buy a round of drinks for everyone. As they do this, three kenyans die of dehydration while their families weep at their feet.

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So Superman walks into a bar right, WRONG, Superman flies into bar

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Why did the boy play Xbox? Because its a quality source of entertainment

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there was a black man n a white man they went into a hauted house the black man saw a penut butter slice n tryed to eat it then the ghost said dont eat the penut butter slice so the black man ran away so then the white man came and saw the penut butter slice the white man toke a bite then the ghots said i told u once i told you 2 i wipe my ass with that penut butter slice

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What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

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Why did Ben Franklin Invent Bifocals? He's a jive turkey.

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A: What Santa said when he caught Mrs. Claus with one of his elves... Q: What is "Ho ho ho?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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