Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

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Three people walk into a bar. Eight people follow them. They all go back to Bob's house, except Anna, Jimmy, and Joe. TImes the amount of people going to Bob's house by four. Thats how many people get arrested at the end of the night. How many people aren't arrested? Do you even know why you read this? Get a life and go to an actual bar, a party and get arrested.

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How did the mom quiet her screaming baby? She threw it out the window.

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Shakespeare walks into a bar, Having just seen someone that has been dead for over 400 years, the young man in the corner quits his drug addiction; it was clearly messing with his brain.

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A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? A Banana. The middle aged man opened the door, prepared to distribute candy to the trick or treaters.

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Roses are Red Lemons are Sour Pull Down Your Pants And Give Me an Hour

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A black guy, a white guy, and a Canadian walk into a bar what do they all have in common. They are all involved in my Joke.

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What's better than rape? Consensual sex.

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Women's Rights

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how many tentacles did the mentally retarded octopus have? answer: 8!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because KFC was hiring

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Why is the deer afraid of the hunter? Because he doesn't want to get shot.

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Why was the girl crying when she got home? She got raped and mugged on the walk home

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What's worst then a road kill? Multiple road kils.

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Knock Knock "Who's there?" "This is Frank from Walside Windows just wondering if you wou..." (Door Slams Shut) "Damn those people are annoying"..

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I asked god for a bike but i know he doesn't work like that so i stole a bike and asked him for forgiveness

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What did Timmothy get when he got back from his vacation in a tropical destination? Malaria.

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How do two blondes stay alive at the bottom of a pool for 30 minutes? They don't and they died

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What did robin say to batman before they got I the car........ Get in the car.

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What do Barney and a butchers knife have in common? One of them is purple

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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Whats worse than biting into an apple and finding half a worm? Biting into another apple and finding the other half

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Did you hear about the kidnapping in Milwaukee? They woke him up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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