Which does does the Mississippi River flow in? Liquid.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the T-REX say to the Yettie? This is a highly improbable situation, therefore there is no need for an answer.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do a mole and an eagle have in common? They both can fly except for the mole

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did a boy get slapped in the hand? A; because he had it in the persons face

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the man run over Suzy? He was a serial killer

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What do you call a boy with no arms or legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's white and smells like crap? An albino tird. Just kidding, Justin Biebers music.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the frog commit suicide? Because his mother was a typewriter

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Ask me if my names Troy. Is your name troy? No, it's Roy.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

how do u make a snooker table laugh? TICKLE ITS BALLS HAHA

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What is furry, red, and flat? Road kill.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did Jimmy burn the American flag? He was Canadian.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Artists have unique minds and can rotate shapes within their mind. I'm going to masterbate.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

how many shit jokes do you need to make before you realize that random does not equal funny? TOO FUCKING MANY

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what is the difference between gravel and dead baby guts? i dont eat gravel.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

thumb_up thumb_down -16

There is no "I" in "TEAM" However, there is a "T" an "E" an "A" and an "M"

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A blond, a brunet, and a red head jumped off a bridge. Which one hit the ground first? In order to solve this problem you would first need to figure out witch of the three had more of a body mass. Then you would need to calculate the accretion in case one brought along a cow. However, in the end the outcome is always the same: 3 dead bodies on impact and 3 mourning families.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

why didnt Tim Tebow go to church? He had practice half an hour before the service was scheduled to start, and to do both was impossible and missing practice would have resulted in disciplinary action from both his coaches and his teammates.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what did the bus driver say to the black man when he got on the bus? nothing, carl has become very anti-social since his brother died

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was an avocado

thumb_up thumb_down -16

So a guy is on his way to work and he nearly gets hit by a bus. He sticks his middle finger up at the bus driver but a couple seconds later he realized that it was the same bus he was supposed to get on so he apologized to the bus driver and got on the bus. He was 15 minutes late for the 420th time this week so he was fired from his job and went back home. On his way home he was not allowed on the bus because he left his oyster card somewhere so he had to walk home. 69 minutes later he arrives home to his wife and kids. What did the man say to his wife when he got back home? "Hi."

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why was the little boy nervous about playing with the little girl? Because she had gonorrhea.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops