Why did the little boy fall off the swing? He didn't have any arms.

A tourist is hungry, so he asks a stranger to point him to the nearest McDonald's. The stranger points to the McDonald's across the street. As the tourist crosses the street, he gets hit by a car AND DIES. McDonald's kills.

Your mom.

What's big and black? A black fridge.

A black guy and a Mexican guy opened a restaurant. They were very successful and became the most popular restaurant in town.

What did the black guy get on his SAT's. Barbecue sauce

Why did Sally fall off the swing set? Because sally has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally

Dont drink and drive. You might spill some.

How do you kill a blonde? Stab her 64 times in the chest.

JUSTIN BEING SMART

What's the difference between being gay and being homosexual? Nothing really. The two words are synonyms so try can be used interchangeably.

How many Jews does it take to change a lightbulb? 1, just because their Jewish doesn't mean their incapable of changing a lightbulb.

a woman walks into a stall with her five yr old daughter. as the mom starts to due her buisness the girl looks down and asks her mom "Mommy why do u have a beard on ur pe-pe?"

Why do black people ride Septa? Because septa is an affordable and convenient means of transportation.

What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

Q: How do you get a one armed Pollock out of a tree? A: Call the fire department.

What did Batman say to Robin before getting into the Batmobile? Robin, get in the Batmobile.

A priest, a rabbi, and a preacher walk into a bar. They ordered a water each.

whats worse than dropping your ice cream down the stairs? dropping your baby down the stairs

How do you make a bird drop a worm? Wring it's neck. P.S: If that anti-joke didn't persuade you to vote thumbs up for this post, then perhaps these delightful lyrics will convince you otherwise. I see them staring back at me They know my name The faces in the sky are looking for something more My friends have paper smiles and laugh at me in all my trials Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia My friends have hollow eyes They're made of shapes and curvy lines Their eyes are everywhere and see everything what do They need me And I need them See me And I see them Within The lines they've been burned in my mind It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow [. From: http://www.elyrics.net/read/e/elena-siegman-lyrics/pareidolia-lyrics.html .] My pareidolia The loneliness is only missed when I am alone O yeah I might try to find my light tonight Hide my sight from eyes I try to fight My nine eyes of light die by the blight Ride white knight unite my plight tonight They're inside me They're inside me I'm inside out I'm inside out They're all around Within without Within without They're inside I'm outisde They're all around They're all around They're inside me I'm inside out They're all around Within without It all ends so violently I know My sweet pareidolia It all ends so painfully and slow My pareidolia la lalala lalala lalala lala

What's better than having a baby in your fridge? Almost anything.

A man walks into a bar... and gets hurt.

Look at your hand. Made you look!

Q:Why did the rockstar put rollerskates on his rocking chair? A:Because he wanted people to she him rocking and rocking on it.(:

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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