Rose's are red, Violet's are blue, I have a gun... Get in the van!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How do you get a cat off a swing? You throw a dog at it.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Yo momma so fat, when she sits on a rainbow nothing happens, as rainbows are merely rays of light refracted off of water particles in the air, apparent to humans only on a visible spectrum.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what is worse than a guy pissed?

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q: Whats black and hangs from a tree???? A: A tire!!!!!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How can you tell if your blind date is going to be good looking? Go on the date and see if they're good looking.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did the sleepy man say to his wife? I'm sleepy.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Roses are stools, Violets are bums, sugar is knit, thank you, LSD.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock, Knock Wh- SWAT TEAM GET ON THE F****** GROUND!!!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -6

JAmie stegman loves making love with his sister... he loves inbreeds so much

thumb_up thumb_down -6

friends are like snowflakes. if you piss on them they go away

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why did the fat person build a lift in his house? He was caring for his terminally ill mother which has a cancer and got both her legs amputated due to the cancer spreading to her legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What kind of people have fat lips? People who have gotten punched in the lip or have suffered a serious lip injury that has caused their lips to swell up.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Whats brown and sticky? A Stick.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Whats worse than your house on fire? an orphanage catching on fire. Whats wosre than an orphanage catching on fire? A bunny farm catching on fire.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock Knock Who's there Me Me who ME LET ME IN

thumb_up thumb_down -6

I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Knock knock The boy doesn't answer because it's dangerous to open your door to strangers while home alone.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What did lil' Suzy do when she got home from school? She was violently mutilated by a bear then continually but raped by a man she met on the Internet. Needless to say, she had a great time. -Harrison

thumb_up thumb_down -6

How do you confuse a Blondel? Tell her there's a demon in her liver

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's worse than this That :(

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why was 95 lb jack able to chug so fast? Because he is a diabetic

thumb_up thumb_down -6

the elephant asks the man, " how do u breathe out of that thing?" the man proceeds to explain to the elephant how he breathes out of his nose.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A black man walks into a white man on the street. The white man viciously beats the black man.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops