Q: What did the forgetful person say to the other? A:

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what do you call a Mexican driving a plane? a pilot you were probably to racist to work that out

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Why is it OK to make fun of a deaf person? Because they can't hear.

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Why does Beyonce sing "to the left, to the left"? Because that's where a box of everything you own is

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Why did the man take a shower?, he didint smell so good...

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What do you do when a bomb is exploding 2 inches away from you? You die.

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Whats worse than getting raped by a cow? Getting raped by two cows.

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How do you stop a black man drowning? Take your foot off his head

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Malcolm Johnson from Zenith windows, I was wondering if I could speak to you for a while about some fantastic offers which we currently have on double glazed windows....

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A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

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there are two muffins in an oven. one says "its getting hot in here". the other says " oh my gosh!!! its a talking muffin!!!"

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A teacher at a school in America is writing on a chalk board. He asks the class what 50 - 20 is. The teacher begins to become impatient when noone put their hands up. This is because the school is an educational facility for asylumn seekers from Rwanda and all of their hands were cut off by a Warlord.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

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why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the fried chicken restaurant... BAWK BAWK cannibal

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What do you call a mexican who steals toasters? A mexican toaster thief.

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14 people jump in a hole about 25 ft deep. they can't climb out because it is a straight vertical drop.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? The Holocaust No, the Holocaust never even happened, you're an idiot.

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What is the difference between a duck? None! One of their legs are both the same.

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What do you call a lawyer without a brain? -Dead

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Knock Knock Whos there? John John Who Tic Tic BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMMMMM

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Why do bees fly? Because evolution made them

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Why couldn't the child go to the park? He was a registered sex offender.

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Bro my d*ck is like 20 inches. That's not healthy, an erection that big will deprive your brain of too much blood and kill you

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why did the kid sit alone at lunch? he had no friends

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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