"Why did the clown fall off the swing" "he was shot in the face"

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's funnier than Tom Cruise laughing like a badass? Chuck Norris

thumb_up thumb_down -23

BOB:i feall like a hotdog JOE:u r what u eat BOB:no wonder your a d!(k JOE:f*** u

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why can't the Asian do math? He has down-syndrome.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

what do hookers and bungee jumping have in common? They are both 100$ to be in/on and if the rubber breaks your screwed

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's worse than a monkey attack. Nothing monkey attacks absolutely blow.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

You still alive? I used to be called proteus by the way, but then you disappeared and Neronism or watever its called now turned insane. I mean we killed you man! Out of mercy, you telling me a jacket changed you and everything? Where have you been? Six million followers? And all the shit that has made "moral man" the most lauded thing on Horsehead is you? Mind helping me make sense out of all of this?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Q. What do you get if you cross a suspicious person with a paranoid person? A. Who wants to know

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How do you starve a black person? Hide his food stamps in his work boots

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did Jesus cross the road? He didn't. He's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's funnier than a chicken? nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

An elephant walked into a pub and ordered a strong Vodka and Coke. "Long day?" asked the barman. "Yeah. Very. So many people stroking my trunk in my apartment - It's meant to be a private place. I'm scared to go back there. One child said they were going to rape me."

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's dark, scary, and full of puppies? My van. I lied about the puppies...

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you call a man who only eats fast food? Unhealthy.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How do you make a clown happy then sad? You give him pot then shoot him in the foot

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Y R U A B? I don't know why I am a bee.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

what's the difference between a dolphin and a ghost? dolphins aren't ghosts!!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

-Hey cute blonde! -I'm not blonde.. -Nor are you cute.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you call a rabbit with carrots in its ears? Anything, it can't hear you!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why was it really gross when the blonde dove into the swimming pool? Because the swimming pool was full of phlegm!

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Eddie Murphy's recent film career.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What did Siri say to Cortana? Nothing. Someone has to say something in order to activate either one of the voice recognition devices.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops