**** *** *** ****** *** ** *** ***? ***** I bet you wish you could read that joke. It was **** hilarious.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A boy tells his friend a 9/11 joke. The boy's friend says "Don't joke about 9/11, my dad died in it." "I'm sorry I didn't know.", responds the boy. "Yeah, that's the last plane he ever flew"

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Your moms so ugly, that when i took her out to eat for dinner we built an everlasting relationship. Thats why you call me dad.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Mexicans are inferior because! BEECUZ! Listen buddy, to be honest, I get girls every now and then because I am what they all want me to be, myself. You are a great friend as far as I am concerned, and I care a lot about you considering I saw you once like... 13 years ago, but I do not spend an entire night chatting with someone on horsehead network out of all things unless that person means a lot more than sex for me... Hell, if I did not feel that nice about you, I would not even have wanted to, and that sounds really awkward for a guy like me to say, believe me, you wont be losing a friend. AS LONG AS YOU KEEP GIVING IT TO ME! I am joking, but this is who I am (sadly) I have many female friends, and yeah well, some I well you know, I am just not the kind of guy that listens to girls sob stories, and pretend to be their gay best friend, while I watch someone bad ass come and bang her... Nah, I am more like that bad ass banger, except I dont break girls hearts afterwards. Seriously, I am really fond of you, to the point where I will say something guys mostly do not say: If you are feeling pressured into stuff, then dont do it, you wont be losing a friend, I wanna spend an intimate night with you (day, shower, on the breakfast table all that) but thats because I really like you, we have built some intimacy in pretty short time if you ask my opinion... See? Now I am being honest and leaving myself vulnerable, and I do that because I honestly care about you.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man arrives at his work late, his boss says "why are you late?" Then man replys "...................." he was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

whats the difference between a thousand dead babies and a porshe? i dont have a porshe in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Have you heard the one about the Priest, the Pastor, and the Mail Man? -no, how's that go? Oh you haven't? That's too bad, it's really good.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

woman's lacrosse

thumb_up thumb_down +4

why did they bury bin laden at sea? because he died

thumb_up thumb_down +4

what is worse - this joke or the last one? what is worse still - sex what is worster - nothing that's not a real word what is wurst? a type of sausage

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot. Duh.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Hitler wasn't such a bad guy. He did kill Hitler.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken had been running in the road's direction for some time, and continued travelling in that direction despite the road being in the way.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red, violets are blue, your Mom is a fake, she adopted you!

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Roses are red Violets are blue I have herpes And now so do you

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why couldn't the turtle swim? Because he went too close to an oil spill, the petroleum got into his mouth and coated his lungs and he is now dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Why did your girlfriend dump you? because someone brainwashed this guy into believing this nonsense.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

An englishman, an irishman and a scotsman walked into a bar. They were all lawyers out on lunch break and happened to walk into the same building. They laughed about the coincidence over the a drink

thumb_up thumb_down +4

knock knock whos their? kevin kevin who? knock knock huh? queef

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Wanna hear a joke? Women Voteing. -Austin Conradt

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Where can you find the best black man soup? I don't know. Cannibilism is no longer socially acceptable.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A blonde walks into an electronic store...she buys an IPhone because someone stole her blackberry, her money, and everything she cares for. Nah, I'm just kiddin', she was murdered.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Wanna hear a joke? (Yeah, sure) So do I, got any?

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A gay man watches football.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops