A dog walks into a bar and orders a pint of beer The barman replies : Woof Woof

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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Why did the bald man die? Cancer.

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A blonde heard that 90% of all crimes occur within a one-mile radius of the home, so she had a security alarm installed.

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This is funny.

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Pacient: Doctor Doctor i think im becoming a vegetable... because of my heriditory bone marrow mutation

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What looks like a rainbow but isn't seen in the sky? A drawing of a rainbow

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what did the man say when he walked into the bar? Ouch!

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"CHOCOLATE!!!!!!!!" -Spongebob

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Why did Lil' Susie leave her blue rain boots at home? Because she had stumps for legs. To attempt to wear them would only hurt her emotionally.

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If you go to America, you won't see any fat black people. They're all dead and in prison.

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What did the mexican say to the other mexican? Lets go get some tacos.

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

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if someone chucks skittles at u and says "taste the rainbow!!!!" chuck m&ms at them and say "Im not afraid!!!!!"

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What is the name of the car? What

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David Copperfield (the magician you moron). "I will now perform my greatest act yet!" Everyone applauded as he put the screaming woman (for effects you know) into the first end of the meatgrinder, and surprisingly grinded meat came out the other side! And the woman? She disappeared... forever! *applause* Moral: BRAVO! BRAVO!

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Ask me if I'm an orange? Are you an orange? No.

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9 tottenham fans walk into a french bar 2 minutes later French fans attack them saying this is for making our history lessons boring 1 shouts ohh the holocaust French fans ash him even more 5 say there call the jew squard next minute there getting attacked by a bunch of kids and lying that there were 30 neo Nazi men.

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What is shit? It's Deshitified already.

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3 black guys walk into a restaurant and they sat down, ate their meals, and even tipped the waitor handsomely then for about 10 minutes they talk and then leave restaurant. Soon after a white guy comes and holds up the place for all it's money then killing three hostages before being taken down by the police.

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What does a black kid get from Christmas? a blunt

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An man walks into a bar and then proceeds to purchase an alcoholic drink.

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If you could eliminate one thing in your life, what would it be ? My ex.

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i did a 360 noscope, then i jizzed. from dylan

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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