A guy asks, "Why was my mom in your bed?" The other guy replies, "Because your mom has a mental disease which inhibits her ability to process thought."

Knock Knock Who's There Lettuce Lettuce who? Lettuce down the street building his new garage

Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

Why are there so many jokes about germans on Anti-Joke? Because the Germans epitomize the flavour of anti-jokes perfectly and they have the whole nazi history thing going on which is ripe ground for many an anti-joke

Whats worst than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being stabbed.

Why does the kid cries when he sees me? Cuz i took his lollypop last week.

why did every one care when i killed my self they didn't

Q:What do you call a wizard who flies? A: A flying wizard.

Haikus usually make sense, but sometimes they don't refrigerator.

a man walks into a bar. it was a metal bar. his balls hurt.

How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

What do you call Mexicans who go to jail? Criminals.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

i like punching orphans in the face, you wanna know why? what are they gonna do? tell their parents???

Okay.. So a dyslectic man walks into a bra...

my girlfriend had a weird fetish, she used to dress up like herself and act like a bitch all the time.

What's silent but deadly? A baby falling from a 10 story building

Why didn't Johns book get published? He had dyslexia.

Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

A horse walks into a bar and the bar asks "Why the long face?". The horse replies " I am deeply troubled by the anthropomorphic aspects of my existence and the extent to which I am now protected by law."

Q: What happens when you divide by zero. A: You get a complex kind of infinite.

What do you call a black woman working at a bar? A Bartender. What do you call an asian woman working at a bar? A Bartender.

Why did the girl fall off the swingset? Because she got hit by a refridgerator.

How many dollies does little Suzie have? Enough to kill 15 men

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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