Why did Susie fall off of the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Why did Susie drown? Because she fell in a puddle. Knock knock Who's there Not Suzy!

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-Why did the jewish man chase after the penny? -Because he's poor and needs to feed his starving family.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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What do you get when you take a bag of chips and divide it by 5? a Nike store worker's meal

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked: "Why the long face?" The horse said: "My wife just died."

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The song Barbra Streisand has more than 2 words.

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a boy walks into a hospital ward, and procedes to break down into tears because his family died

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whats annoying and won't go away?. Aids.

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So i can type anything in this box and it shows up on the website?

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Why didn't the politically-correct lawyer laugh at his black neighbour's jokes? He had an incapacitating malady of oralfacialoaralysis rendering him unable to laugh or smile

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my rhyme is sicker than the holocaust

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Your name is Fired, your Boss comes up to you and says "Your Fired" You say "I know my name." Your boss gets mad and throws you in a chimney

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womans having rights.

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A drunk man into a bar. He is ripping apart a family

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Knock Knock........wait there cars gone, I'll come back later

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what did Tim get for Valentimes day? nothing, no such day exists. spell check

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How do you kill an elephant? -With a gun? No, an elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? -With an elephant gun? No, with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a blue elephant? -WIth a blue elephant gun? No, you choke it until it turns blue and kill it with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a purple elephant? Theres no such thing as a purple elephant, thus contradicting the reality of performing a major act of animal abuse on it.

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He didn't give in to peer pressure.

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When will pigs fly? When they grow horns

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What do you get when you eat all the potatoes? They're all gone...

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What do you call a guy with a rubber toe? . . . . . . . Roberto

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I was typing a new book today (literature wild west, and I realized I had been writing the same shit over and over again for eight hours and was dead tired when It went so..) Welcome to the wild west, guns! Hayballs! MONSTER TRUCKS! And then I kinda thought to myself... Is it just me or am I trying a bit too hard? So guys? What do you think, am I trying a bit too hard here? Funny story, I am tired and drank lots of coffee, so I am holding back in order to not try so hard... Not trying hard enough to hold back? I am asking you! WHY? BECAUSE YOUR ANSWER DOES NOT MATTER! ARE WE GAME?

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 brutally raped and murdered 32.

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Q. What do you call a dog thats deaf? A. A horribly abused domesticated animal that needs a kinder owner.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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