chuck norris is a little b|tch

Why did the koala fall off the tree? Because it was dead.

this going to be my new text thingy! i dont have a phone! WATS UP!

How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot off its head.

Why won't sharks attack lawyers? Humans tend to fight back, and sharks wouldn't usually be so hungry as to endanger their own lives in this way. Besides, most places where humans swim have shark barriers.

Your mother is so fat, she spends all day in her bedroom, eating chocolate and crying herself to sleep.

Q. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become? A. It will Wet or Sink, as simple as that.

Roses are red, violets are blue. Except, technically, violets are violet.

Joey and Jack walked into a bar, and proceeded to have gay sex on the floor.

A murder, a cheater, and a liar walk into a bar..... Woah the aptriots must be in town -Rocco Tufano

What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot, you racist.

How do you kill a clown shoot it in the face

Four guys walk into a bar. They buy their drinks and stay for a couple of hours. After they are done they get a cab ride home. It was a lovely night.

Why does Waldo wear stripes? Because he doesn't want to be spotted

What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? A dead baby causes years of grief and broken families

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: Nobody cares because its a chicken

How do you make a chicken laugh. By showing it how to cross the road

how do you get 100 dead babies in a bucket? use a blender. how do you get 100 dead babies out of a blender? Doritio's

A black man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and chats with his work friends. Then he goes home to his loving family.

What do you call a man that was decapitated by a stray saw blade? An ambulance until when you have a reality check and realize that in the mass hysteria of witnessing such a horrific event that this man is already dead. You then callan undertaker, his family and his friends to attend his funeral in a week or so. You then walk over to him and cry.

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

A man walks into bar. Which is no surprise as he'd been drinking heavily and his spacial awareness was poor at the best of times.

What do you call a black man without a job? A man disenfranchised by the failing American economy.

What did Jesus get for Christmas? Birthday presents.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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