Knock Knock Who's there? Me ill kill u,

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Your dad is so gay that he payed for a male prostitute to have sex and now your family is in ruins.

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why can't hellen keller eat a pizza? because she is dead.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why couldn't Billy the bird fly? He was an ostrich, ostriches can't fly.

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A man goes to a gas station to pump gas in his car. After about 7 minutes, he leaves.

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Find x X + 2 = 5 ^ I found it

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What are the biggest ants in the world? Ants under a magnifying glass.

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Roses are red Grass is green Get in the van If you know what I mean

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What did the old man say? Im old

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Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a hammer. The other is a watermelon.

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Two Jews are sitting in a large oven. They realize it is a dangerous place to be and get out of the oven.

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I have a really funny joke.

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When is a great time to eat chicken fingers? Never Chickens dont have fingers therefore making it misnamed and impossible to eat them

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What do you call a bunch of white men sitting on a bench? The NBA.

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What does the Fawkes say? "Remember, remember, the 5th of November..."

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qu'est ce qui est petit et poilu? un asticot poilu

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You sick fiend

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Johnny had 100 chocolate bars. He ate 95 and gave 3 to his friend. What does Johnny have now? Diabetes

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How do you stop a clown from smiling? Hit it with an axe!

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue Wait Arent Violets purple?

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Chris. Chris who? Wow, I thought we were better friends than that.

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and in turn wasting money

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What did the caterpillar say to the robot? Nothing. Caterpillars do not have vocal chords and there are not, as yet, any truly portable robots capable of comprehending speech so to speak to one would be pointless.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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