what did the chocolate bar say to the ice cream cone? nothing: chocolate bars can't talk

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A seal walks into a club. The poacher continues to beat the seal to death.

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One day a duck was swimming on the lake and sees an alligator. The alligator says "You will be my next victim." The duck says "Quack."

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What do you call a black stormtrooper. What ever his name happens to be.

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If it looks like grass, smells like grass, and tastes like grass... Then you were honestly misled when ordering that salad.

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Why was the black man driving a plane? because he was a pilot, you racist.

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Why did the referee go to the zoo? He likes animals

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Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

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Why cant the guy drink his beer Because he hasnt opened it yet

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What did one planet say to the other? Nothing. Space is a vacuum in which sound cannot propagate due to the absence of a matter or particle medium.

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Why didn't Little Timmy's parrot talk? It's neck had snapped.

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A muslim walks onto a plane. He goes to 13C as that is his seat designated on his ticket.

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Ask me if I'm a tree..... "are you a tree?" No.

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knock knock who's there Romney Romney Who? RON PAUL 2012

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What did the angry asian man do after he crashed his car? He died of serious head trauma and internal bleeding.

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How do you kill a dwarf? You put rope around his neck and attach the other end to a concrete slab. Proceed to then through him in the ocean.

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Do ya like waffles? Ya we like waffles.

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Beka has AIDS

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Why don't woman wear watches? Because there is a clock on the stove!

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How do you kill a blond? Shoot her in the face.

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Q: Whats the best part of a bald pussy? A: After you put the diaper back on you perv!

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Rebecca Black walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender doesnt serve her because she is 12.

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what do you call a black clerk? one of the 2 billion people with a job, u bum!

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What did the smurf say to the other smurf? Smurf

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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