why did the boy drop his icecream? Because he got hit by a boat

o | ,'~'. / \ | ____|_ | '___,,_' .----------------. | ||(o |o)| ( KILL ALL HUMANS! ) | ------- ,----------------' | _____| -' \ '####, ------- /________\ ( ) |) '_ ' ,------|\ _ /_ / | |_\ || /_ /| | o| _\ _|| /_ / | | |\ _\____//' | ( ( | | | (_,_,_,____/ \ _\ | ------| \ _\|_________| \ _\ \__\\__\ |__| |__||__| ||/__/ |__||__| |__||__| |__||__| /__)/__) /__//__/ /__//__/ /__//__/. .' '. '. (_kOs____)____)

What did the boy reading a book do? Run into a pole.

Why didn't you return my call? Cause I F@%Kin Hate you!...And Just wanted to tell you in person....

Why do they call it lunchmeat? Because it is meat that you eat at lunch.

how do you drown a blonde? chain her to a cinder block and throw her off a bridge.

Why doesn't the Athiest wear socks? He has a minor fungal condition on his feet.

Someone thought that an onion was the only food that made you cry. So I threw a watermelon at his face.

Q: What does DNA stand for? A: National Dyslexic Association

why did the goose lay an egg? because it was pregnant .

Knock knock "Steve I have a door bell."

I rolled and evaded the bomb, I still was injured.

Three blondes were stuck on an island, one of them wished for a motorboat, later on they all died of starvation

Q: What did the bulbasoar say to the charmander? A: bulbasoarrr

The AIDS patient was gay

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs on a porch? Bob

How come Hellen Keller couldn't drive? Because she was blind and deaf, therefore incapable of performing such a task.

A man went in for a doctors appointment and said, "Doc, it hurts when I do this." The doctor responded, "Try to abstain from from putting stress on that area. It might alleviate the pain a bit."

Q - Want to hear a joke? A - Me Too.

What is the difference between a Jew and a canoe? A canoe tips.

why did the chicken cross the road? because there were no cars coming, and felt compelled to get to its family

The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

Where to, sir? Forward.

I know what makes young boys "explode" -dynamite

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...