My friend came out.....of the bathroom so I could shit

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because a random biological stimulus compelled it to.

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66

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What did the man say to the man? Awkward.

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What did the ghost say to the bee? BOOBEE

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Person A: Is your refrigerator running? Person B: Yes Person A: Good! Now, your milk won't spoil.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? To have a shit.

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Who owns the streets of Comton The mayor

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why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Why did the cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the third cat fall out of the tree? It was tied to the second cat. Why did the fourth cat fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the fifth cat fall out of the tree? It needed to get down, but couldn't find any other way down. After he fell, he was minorly hurt and ate some cat food.

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Why did the pigeon rape itself? It had mental issues.

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What does an elephant and a red soda have in common? Neither collects stamps.

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knock knock. who's there? Ida Ida who? Idanno, don't ask me.

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What does a dyslexic person call God? Dog

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Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck CAN chuck wood, that's why his a wood chuck.

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Why do black people like chicken? It's usually fried.

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What is E.T. short for? He has small legs

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a child and his father were on a bike ride the child tried to cross a street but was run over by a truck. His father now lives homeless and griefs his dead son.

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What's worse than being a Jew in 2010? Being a Jew in 1942.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Since chickens cannot speak, it is difficult to say.

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Yo mama so fat, when she went to a party, they took the apple from the roast pig's mouth, and they put it on her mouth.

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Q: What happened to Sally, did she get that cough checked out? A: She died while driving there and got in a 12 car pileup.

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What does it mean when the drummer drools out of both sides of their mouth? They may have had a stroke and you should immediately call 911.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops