What do you get when you cross a cheetah and a zebra? A dead zebra.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Why did the the dog not eat its food? Because the night before the dog had gotten serious disease and lost appetite

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What's worse than the Holocaust? The eventual extinction of humanity, followed by the death of the universe.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

What's creepy about a loving couple having sex? I made them do it.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

A man walks in to a bar. He gets a cuncussion and his heath insurance isn't enough to cover his physical therapy. He dies poor and alone.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

why do woman love the twilight books? i have no idea woman can't read

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Sticks and stones may break my bones because I have osteoporosis

thumb_up thumb_down +37

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear, Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair... Fuzzy Wuzzy has cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Some anti-jokes are funny, some are not!

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Britney got to the top of the building. What did she do next? She jumped off to end her miserable life

thumb_up thumb_down +35

What did David's mom give him for his birthday? Nothing he hasn't seen her in eight years.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

whats purple and not a rapist barney, I lied about the rapist part

thumb_up thumb_down +35

If we had some ham, we could have ham and eggs; if we had some eggs.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Why did Rihanna sing "to the left, to the left"? Because people usually sing in songs

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A doctor tells a guy: "I have bad news. You have Alzheimer's, and you have cancer." Guy says, "Thank God I don't have cancer."

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: No one knows, he was a chicken, and was not capable of human speech, so he never told anyone.

thumb_up thumb_down +35

A wise man once said, "I am wise".

thumb_up thumb_down +35

Whats the best day of the week? Sponge

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? It thought they were playing follow the leader. Why did the refrigerator fall out of the tree? It had no arms. Why did the little girl fall off her tricycle? She was hit by three monkeys and a refrigerator.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

whats similar between a chicken and an alligator they both gobble except for they alligator

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Why'd the guy fall off the building? I pushed him

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Q: Why did the boy fall of the swing? A: He had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +33

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops