Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. ;)

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's the difference between Batman and a black guy? One is a guy that dresses up like a bat and fights crime and the other is just a mild-mannered person.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's worse than being hit with a falling brick? Being hit with many falling bricks. -ilikecrepes97

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you get a Jewish boy for Christmas? Nothing he died in 1943!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

roses are red and violets are blue so is your mums fanny

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did Captain Obvious crossed the road? Because that's the name of the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the girl fall over? She was poisoned for being the fairest one of all.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

10 years later...... a baby is born in Japan and has 26 toes due to radiation

thumb_up thumb_down -21

When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

thumb_up thumb_down -21

1/= |_| (4|\| /234|) 7|-|15 (411 */0|_|/2531/= 4 1337 |-|4><0/2!!!1!

thumb_up thumb_down -21

whats brown and has wings? a stick, i lied about the wings bit

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's black and white and red all over? A blood-soaked zebra

thumb_up thumb_down -21

An egg and a sausage walk into a bar, and the barman says "sorry, we don't serve breakfast".

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do a rubix cube and a penis have in common? The more you play with it the harder it gets.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How do you get a elephant in a fridge? You open the fridge and put it in. How do you get a Rhino in a fridge? You take the elephant out and then put the rhino in. All the animals in the animal kingdom are at a meeting, what animal isn't there? The rhino, his in the fridge. How do you cross a river full of alligators? Walk across the allligators are at the meeting.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

"Lets begin, tell me about yourself," "ok, well first I'm a open book and..." "ok next" "why?" "I fucking hate books!"

thumb_up thumb_down -21

One day a man named Tyler put a picture of an Asian in his wallet and proceeded to call himself Asian even though he was of Caucasian. Then a theif pick pocketed his wallet and was confused.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? it has no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What did the frog say when he heard his family was dead? "ribbit"

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the man jump into the river? He wanted to go for a swim, but the pool was closed, so he swam in the river.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

There are 3 guys, a fat guy, a skinny guy, and sexy guy. They all work together and have lunch together. The fat guy opens his bag and eats a ham and turkey sandwich. The skinny guy opens his bag and eats a tuna sandwich. The sexy guy opens his bag and eats an egg sandwich. The fat guy finishes his meal. The skinny guy saves half for later. The sexy guy ate more than half of his food. A genie magically appears. The End

thumb_up thumb_down -21

An elderly lady walks into a grocery store, and nothing of a great significance happens.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

RUN

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops