roses are red violets are blue i take pleasure in the simple things in life as i have nothing else left to live for

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What's the hardest part of the pizza to eat? The motorbike.

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chuck norris was shot yesterday... tomorrow is the bullets funeral.

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why are there so many homeless asians with squinty eyes, they cant find their way back home

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A white guy, a black guy, an Asian guy, and a hispanic guy are standing before a cliff. They proceeded to take lovely pictures.

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A guy named John wanted to finish his life. Now he is dead

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Why did little Suzan fall of the swing? She has no arms. Knock,Knock Who's there? Not Suzan

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What happens when your dog is bad? A crying dog who has to sleep in the BACKYARD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid dog....

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What did batman say to robin before they got in the car? Get in the car!

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Why didn't the new baseball cap fit little Tommy? Because Tommy was decapitated

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Two peanuts walk down the street. One was a salted.

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A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

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the awkward moment when you have a boner on your boner

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stephen hawking walks into a bar...

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Why was the trash man feeling sad about his life? Because he had a mild case of depression to which his doctor recommended taking antidepressant pills.

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Did you hear about that man who ate 17 cheeseburgers?! I didn't.

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A chicken walked into the bar...

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What's green and eats rocks? A green rock eater What's purple and eats rocks? It hasn't been discovered by science yet...

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"You know what sucks?" "Vaccuumes?" "You know what metaforically sucks?" "Black holes?" "You know what just isn't cool?" "Lava?"

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What does the black guy look for when he goes shopping? Some soap for his dead cat in the living room.

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why is six afraid of seven? because seven is black

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My mum is called Steve

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I was walking down the street the other day And I pushed a child under a bus

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Why do elephant tusks stick out? For uprooting trees and bushes, and for defending their young.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops