Q: Why did Jimmy not have balls? A: A terrible, terrible sand paper accident.

i know you talk the talk but can you talk the talk

why do midgets surf in kitchens? because of microwaves.

no pen = no studying no studying = bad grades bad grades = no job no job = no money no money = no food no food = death DON'T LOSE YOUR PEN

what is orange and sounds like a parrot a carrot

What can you use a broken watch for? A compass.

yo momma is so fat that she contributes to americas obesity problem

Roses are red, Violets are blue, when the bass droped, my balls did too.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it got out of its cage, was running away from its owner, and crossing a busy street seemed like the most effective way to gain freedom.

In Soviet Russia it's pretty cold.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He had to get to the other side.

Yo mama's so ugly, one day she looked in the mirror and her face was a wreck. Later that day she committed suicide.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, it was kind of by chance that it crossed the road and what is the big deal lots of animals cross the road. For example possums, squirrels, deer, raccoons, cats, dogs, rabbits do pretty often too it's weird because sometimes more rabbits cross the road on Easter I don't know if that's just me though, chipmunks, bears, over in Africa probably tigers and lions cross those roads.

Why did the boy drop his ice cream? I shot him in the face.

Sarah lost both arms in a car accident Knock knock Who's there? Not sarah. Roses are red Violets are blue Wow. Clever Knock knock Who's there? Still not Sarah, as she is in a serious condition at her local hospital, and so is fighting for her life.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Gestapo.

Q: Where was Moses when the lights went out. A: In the dark.

What did the duck say when it saw a puddle? Nothing.Ducks are uncapable of speaking human speech.

what is black and white and red all over? a group of people of mixed races playing paintball.

What did the fat confused man say? I am confused.

Q: What's worse than being stung by a bee A: The Rwandan Genocide

A horse walked into a bar. The bartender asked: "Why the long face?" The horse said: "My wife just died."

What happens when you go swimming in the rain? You get wet.

What is hard, long, moist, and flesh colored? A hotdog you dirty, dirty bastard!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...