My mom touched my wiener : \

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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a blond goes to high school and gets terrible grades. she then goes online and realizes that it's because she's blond. so she shaves all her hair of and went back to high school and got terrible grades... I guess the lesson in this is once a blond, always a blond. she then got bit from a rabid butterfly and died in a hole

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What was the pirate movie rated? PG-13.

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Knock knock. Who's there? The landlord. You're being evicted.

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What did Lance Armstrong say to his critics? I have one testical

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Why did Superman not stop the planes on 9/11? He was quadroplegic.

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Yo Mamma

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I've ben told to open all your windows when a tornado comes. Who told you THAT? A guy who opened all his windows when a tornado came.

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What is the difference between your mother and a hooker? Gonorrhea and her father's approval.

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There was a mexican and a african in a car, who was driving? The cop, because both of these men are rapists.

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roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, get in the van

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how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

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Acouple of grammer nazis walk into a bar & 'their' treated very poorly.

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Knock, Knock Open the fucking Door

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All work and no play makes Johnny successful in his field of interest.

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Why did the cheeseburger have seeds on its buns? Because it wasn't a taco.

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A man walks into a Library and asks for a book on suicide. The Librarian says: "Do you have a library card?" The man says no and applies for one.

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What did susan boyle say when she saw a 10 year old boy get hit by a bus? "OH MY GOD, SOMEBODY RING AN AMBULANCE"

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Q:: when artificial intelligence takes over the planet, what will become of anti-joke.com? A:: idk, but my cousin's girlfriend and I will get naked together and she will get on top of me and tell me I'm awesome and that my d*ck feels really good inside her. you see by the time AI takes over, the means to create virtual reality experiences will be greatly enhanced.

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What is the siilarity between Justin beiber and pinoccio? they both waant to be real boys

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why did obama become president? people voted 4 him.

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A skeleton walks into a bar. It's inside a person. He orders a beer and enjoys it contentedly.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He realized he was in the ghetto

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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