Hey, you have small hands.

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A baby seal walks into a bar. Animal services are called and the seal is returned to its natural habitat. A man then beats it dead with a blunt object.

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A suicide bomber enters a bar. Everyone dies.

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I was walking down the street one day when suddenly, a chicken crossed the road. Apparently it wanted to cross to the other side.

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how do you get a cow in the fridge? Open the fridge, and insert. How do you get a kangaroo in the fridge? Take the cow out and insert What animal is not in the lion king? kangaroo --WHY hes still in the fridge

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how do you make a fat black man cry? Rape his wife.

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What do you call 2 black men next to me. 2 Dead Men

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What is the most dangerous gull in the world? A gull with a machine gun!

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nik nak paddy wack give the dog a breathalyzer test

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Father: Son stop masterbating u might go blind Son: But Dad I'm over here

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How do fish die in water? The BP oil spill

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Q: How many cows does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: Infinite, cows do not have thumbs, in fact, they have hooves. This disables them from holding any large objects without the use of their mouthes.

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How do you drown a blonde? Keep her head under water for 2 minutes because thats when the human brain starts to loose oxygen.

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Knock,Knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Orange you going to let me in?

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FUTURE-CHEESE!!!!!!!!!!!! :)

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Why couldn't the car drive? Because its wheels were made of butter.

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why was the man sad? His mom was killed in a car accident. His wife commited suicide? His kids were drowned in the bathtub by their mother before she commited suicide. But he was sad because he forgot to take his depression medication.

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how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

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Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 rapes people

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This is a joke for Homeless people:

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why do giraffes have long necks? because their heads are a long way from their bodies

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You're really messed up right now... elephants don't talk

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MWAAHHHHHAHAHHAH

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Why did the girl fall if her bike? -she has no arms

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops