why did the giraffe cross the road? because my dad and his "fishing buddies" are having another "meeting" in the basement. I hear weird noises, and I haven't seen my little sister in weeks, since the last "meeting." Dad said she went to a special camp for little girls. I hear horrible noises.

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why couldn't max ride his bike? because max is a goldfish.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. 'Who's there.' The chicken.

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What is the secret to losing weight? Limb Amputation.

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There once was a man from Nantucket I raped him. The End.

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A: Knock Knock! B: Whos there? A: Its the f**king cops we have you surrounded.

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A black man walks into a bar. He orders a drink and chats with his work friends. Then he goes home to his loving family.

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Yo Mama is so fat She wears XL clothes.

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What do iPhones and Nokias have in common The nokia is indestructible. I lied about the iPhone

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Why did the blonde go to McDonald's ? Because she was hungry.

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how do you own a ginger? you don't nobody wants them.

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So I showed my friend my blind dog. He said, "Wow I've never seen a blind dog before!" I said, "they havnt seen you either."

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Person A: Is your refrigerator running? Person B: Yes Person A: Good! Now, your milk won't spoil.

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Why do asians have such thin eyes? Genetics

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was Catholic and was having an identity crisis. Thinking that he was the road, he panicked and crossed himself.

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How did the kid drop his ice cream cone? Ans. He got hit by a bus

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what did the jewish man say to the christian man on the first day of hannukah? i like basketball

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A mogwai walks into a bar. The bartender says "Sorry, we don't feed mogwais after midnight."

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What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A pilot you racist.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms or legs

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I used to work at a lightbulb factory... I made the filaments

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

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When does the baby talk When you remove ypur feet from its mouth

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My nipple is bleeding

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops