Q: What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A: A pharmacist

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my names jim haha

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Q. What did the man with no heart say? A. Nothing. No living creature can live without a heart.

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Three guys and 4 Catholics are in a bar. They guys are making a joke. The first one says I'm gonna go to Oregon there's no Catholics there and the second one says I'm gonna go to Ohio there is no Catholics there and the third one says I'm gonna go to Alaska there's no Catholics there and one of the Catholics walk up and say how about you go to hell theres no Catholics there.

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what did the beaver so to the rattle snake? snap your bagles

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doctor, doctor, i feel sick the doctor runs some tests on his patient then comes to a conclusion then the doctor says " you are fine"

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What happened after four homosexual clowns all squeezed into a little toy car simultaneously? Children and parents alike were amazed by this feat, and considered their $5 entrance fee very well spent.

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21

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Did you hear the one about the kinky dominatrix? No. Damn. I really wanted the details.

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A racist indian (from india) walks into a bar (in india). A catholic priest walks into the same bar. The bar says 'moo'. The bar is a shape-shifting cow.

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Two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Obviously.

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What did the homeless man get for christmas? Nothing

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A: Knock Knock! B: Whos there? A: Its the f**king cops we have you surrounded.

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Your Momma's so ugly that if she got plastic surgery she would probably look better

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Why do asians have such thin eyes? Genetics

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Goats are like mushrooms, If you shoot a duck im scared of toasters

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Why does bobby have no friends? He's dead.

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Who would win in a fight, Godzilla or a Tyrannosaurus Rex? It doesn't matter because Godzilla is fictional and a T-Rex is extinct.

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A black guy gets arrested...

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Roses are red, I have a phone, nobody texts me, forever alone...

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why was the boy crying? ... because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken

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A guy walks into a bar, and then orders a jack and coke.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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