Why do priest touch children? They are sexually deprived and frustrated because their religion forbids them from having a normal sexual relationship with the opposite sex.

How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? A wood chuck CAN chuck wood, that's why his a wood chuck.

Why did the chickecross the roe? Because I was bein chased by an angry group o mobsters that 8 years ago were busted by the chicken when he was still working for NYPD and found them all in an ally and busted them for later discovered tax evasion and then 2 years later they found a way ou of prison and tracked down the chicken for 6 years until they found him in road island 4509 lake side estates and then proceeded to chase him onto and across a road that was near by to his lake side apartment and then they go tire and we. Back to their HQ in NY and then the leader of the gang went home and in a depression fuels rage mersiouy beat his wife then went up stairs and threw his 9 year old son out the window and hanged himself. The chicken also died because 8 years is at the top of their lifespan.

What does a dyslexic person call God? Dog

Goats are like mushrooms. If you shoot a duck, I'm afraid of toasters.

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

Why did the armless girl fell off the swing? Because somebody pushed her. Why did se fell again? Because somebody pushed her again.

Arent you my dark knight in black armor, you would seriously put your life on the line for my sake?

Knock knock, come in.

Why do most married men die before their wives? Men have on average a shorter life expectancy than women.

why was the man sad? His mom was killed in a car accident. His wife commited suicide? His kids were drowned in the bathtub by their mother before she commited suicide. But he was sad because he forgot to take his depression medication.

How do you lock out a Chinese Person? Lock the door

how do you get a girl to stop ignoring you? you kill her family with her watching.

So its 1945, and these two blonds walk into a bar....I forget the rest of the joke, but Japan ends up getting nuked.

What's better than group sex? Gang rape

Why did the little girl jump off a cliff? because she was at a cliff jump at a water park

here's a joke: Ron Paul: Hope for America

Last time I heard that I dropped my i-phone

A man was chopping wood, he then brought the wood to his house and lit a fire.

what did the schizophrenic get for his birthday? new friends

robin has a boy friend its the green lantern

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house. Knock knock. 'Who's there.' The chicken.

why did the black man drown? he cant swim

Knock Knock. Ow! Why you hit me!?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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