What do you get when you cross a penis with a dinosaur? A dicklodocus.

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A person tells an anti-joke. Nothing out of the ordinary happens.

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I went out for a nice evening with my wife last week, and we kept getting dirty looks because I'm 42 and she's 19. I get that people are a little weird about that for whatever stupid reason, but it totally ruined our tenth anniversary.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? He died! Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? He was attached to the first! Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? He thought it was a game! Why did the fridge fall out of the tree? The branch broke! Why did Sally fall off her bike? She got hit by three monkeys and a fridge!

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If X = 3 and Y = 7, what is X + Y = ? It doesn't matter. You forgot to put your name on the test which means you got an automatic fail.

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What did the Rabbi say when the Priest asked how his family was? The Rabbi breaks into tears as he explains his family was killed in the Holocaust.

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What do you call a blonde who passed the SAT's? An excellent student.

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Three people walk into a bar. Eight people follow them. They all go back to Bob's house, except Anna, Jimmy, and Joe. TImes the amount of people going to Bob's house by four. Thats how many people get arrested at the end of the night. How many people aren't arrested? Do you even know why you read this? Get a life and go to an actual bar, a party and get arrested.

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What is grosser than somebody eating their own booger? Someone else eating that persons booger

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A man is unemployed, ugly, short, fat, smelly and stupid. That's what she said.

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Why did the black man go to hospital? To cure his black.

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A person from Singapore eats

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How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

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Whats big, grey, and cant climb trees? A carpark

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i know you talk the talk but can you talk the talk

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Do you know what really hurts my feelings? Nerve damage.

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What do you call a kid with down syndrome and no arms? Whatever his name is.

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A man looks at a glass and says that it is half full. Another man looks at the glass and says that it is half empty. A feminist looked at the glass and said it was being raped

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Your momma so stupid, she speaks poorly and can't spell very well.

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Why didn't George Washington get his drivers license? Cars were yet to be invented.

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what do you call a shitty anti-joke? A shitty anti-joke.

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What's better than rape? Consensual sex.

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What's black, white, and red all over? An African American and Caucasian man painting a house with red paint and accidentally spilling some on themselves

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What do you call a discounted watercraft? It is traditional to give it a female name.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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