A seal walks into a club.

Why couldn't Jimmy wash his hair? He has leukemia and therefore no longer has hair.

What's flaming and has wheels? A firepit. I lied about the wheels.

Whats big, red and will cause severe injuries possibly fatalities if it falls out a tree? A phone box

why did the mexican steal the money? because he was financially struggling and needed the money to support his family

Why was Katy Perry naked with your mom? Because they were having sex

What did the penis say to the vagina? Cover me, im going in.

Q:what is long ,black and red but smells like poo.? A:poo from someone dying of bowel cancer.!

You wanna know something that doesn't exist? Grandma's.........that haven't given BLOW JOBS!

1 white girl and 2 black men -TRAGIC

What do you do if you run over a black man? Call an ambulance... he's probably about to die.

Apirl showers bring... Tornadoes that kill families

What's another name for asexual reproduction? Parthenogenesis.

Whats funny about a man in a pink leotard ? Nothing infact i think he's very brave

How do you make a plumber cry? Murder his family.

What's brown and sits in the woods? Winnie's poo

An elephant stomped on a mouse. What did the mouse say? Nothing, the mouse was incapable of speech due to the elephants actions.

Would you like to go to my jinga party, if you do save the date 9/11?

Why does Mario grown on shrooms? Because they bloom inside of him.

What is worse than braking a fingernail, Learing that a clown raped your entire family

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Tulips can be of multiple colors.

What rhymes with car? Not kangaroo

How many babies does it take to paint a house? It depends on how hard you throw them.

Whats worse than your roof caving in on you? Being stabbed by yard gnomes.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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