A Jew, an Irishman and a Russian walk into the bar and the bartender says, "Get the Hell out."

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Why did the man lose the spelling bee? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

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A blind, black guy walks into a building. Unfortunately it was a secret KKK building and they beat him, raped him and left him to die. Luckily he was found alive and transported to the hospital. To bad the hospital was bombed by Al Queda.

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Q: How do you give a frigid woman an orgasm? A: By making her come.

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Knock knock Who's there Evan Evan who Evans erectile area is largo with Sarah plains pudding

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Yo momma's such a whore that she violates the sanctity of marriage by sleeping with men other than her husband.

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How many blondes did it take to screw in the lightbulb? Just one. She did a fine job.

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Why shouldn't I go out today? Well I haven't done any work today. Actually no. It's not that. I'd have to ask my guardian Sally to bring out the wheelchair, and well, I'm afraid of her. She beats me. My hobbies are playing football, watching Loose Women and looking at pictures of Gary Barlow on Google Images.

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A man serves his wife dinner. She laughes and tells him it tastes funny. He then procedes to tell her that is because he put large amounts of poision into the food.

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Want to hear a dirty joke? A pig fell in the mud…

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women's rights

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why would the chicken cross a road

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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What's the difference between a cow and some dirt? They're the same except for almost everything

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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Remember those days where we planned what to do with our lives instead of wondering what things lied ahead? Those where the days, it does not matter if we are relics, heroes, or villains today. Back then, we did not seek to discover our future, we sought to create it, back then our people did not pray for a better day, but worked for it. And love and kindness was not something only found in heaven, but what we shared in what was the closest thing, to heaven on earth. Tell me the truth, are there many like us left in this world?

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Sugar is sweet. You're adopted.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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A man walks into a grab and go restaurant and asks the man if he can stay, the man replies "yes."

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What did one dandelion say to the other dandelion? Answer- Take me to your weeder!

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how did helen keller's parents punish her? stuck a plunger in the toilet

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Before her maiden voyage, they told the Titanic she could become anything. So she became a submarine.

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A man drives home from a bar one night, He is under the influence and his reckless driving will costs many innocent people their lives.

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roses are red violets are blue get down your trousers cause im waiting for you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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