What do you do when you walk downstairs and see your TV floating? Call Ghostbusters.

Why couldn't the pirate watch the violent movie? Because pirates died along time ago

Why did the fat man get thrown out of an all you can eat buffet? He molested a waitress

why did the bus hit the kid? he dropped his ice cream.

How do Yankees fans cheer for their favorite sports team? Let's go Yankees!

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Most poems rhyme, But his one doesn't.

Knock, knock. Who's there? Sasquatch. Sasquatch who? ROAR

Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

What's the difference between Asians and buckets? I don't use Asians to scoop water out of the lake.

Why did Elsa go into hiding. She died

What does these 3 words all have in common? terrifiant, hrollvekjandi, Przera?aj?ce They all mean the same thing describing Ian! CREEPY

what is black and hangs from the tree in my back yard? a moldy apple.

What did the cat say to the chicken? Meow

"Knock Knock" "Who's There" "It's Dallas" "Dallas Who" James and Dallas's relashonship quickly deteriorated as Dallas realized he and James been best friends for 2 years and James doesn't even know his name.

What's worse than getting your dog neutered? You being the dog.

One dog says to the other "I love going for walks!" A women over-hears, screams "A Talking Dog!", and calls the police. The dog is put down and dissected for scientific research.

What do you call an armless legless man swimming? Dead

ROSES ARE RED VIOLETS ARE BLUE I LIKE TITS TITS

Yo mamma's so fat that the gravity required to keep her on the ground is significantly smaller than an average sized human.

Why was the little boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

Why am I telling you this joke? Because I entered the following, agreed to the Terms of Service, and clicked "submit".

a person who will soon die of beeties

I guy goes into a coffee shop and says I'll have a coffee and a danish. The clerk says we're all out of danish. The guy says I'll just have the danish then.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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