Guest-knock knock (silence) Guest-hello is anyone there? no go away Guest-looks like there is no one here lets leave

Q: When there's something strange In your neighbourhood, Who you gonna call? A: The Local Authorities!

What doesn't kill you makes you stronger. Unless this event results in you being a vegetable.

Roses are Red Violets are Purple But nothing rhymes with purple.

Chicken

What do you call the Doctor who graduated at the bottom of his class? Doctor.

Q: Where do you go when its cold? A: A corner because its 90 degrees.

The name "Hunter Barksdale".

How do you get a one-armed Polish man out of a tree? With a ladder.

Whats worse than a creep? ..... Paul sweeney!

Why are New Yorkers hated on so much? Becuase the Yankees suck ass.

how could you not hav not died of dehyderation?

How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Hit him with an ax.

Why did the skeleton not get invited to the party? Because he was a heroin addict

A Muslim on a plane yells out "Hijack!" Jack replies with "Hello" and the two engage in a casual conversation for the duration of the flight.

Roses are red Violets are blue I am staraiL so dont touch me!!!!!

Last Christmas I gave you my heart But the very next day Your body rejected it and you went into cardiac arrest, we both died

Jeff has 45 candy bars. He eats 40. What does Jeff have? Diabeetus

being sober in a bar fight

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? At age two, she contracted an illness that left her blind, deaf, unable to speak, and was considered backwards of intelligence. She lived in a dark and hopeless world of her own, rendering her unable to do anything, let alone drive.

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

Roses are gay, Violets are gay, I f*cked your mom You have aids.

A dog walks into a bar Because the door was open -Tag

knock knock whos there haha this is a shit joke anyone that reads this is a jimmy saville follower and got fingered up the bum hole violently by him love you

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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